Name, Identity, Duality?

At the time of my birth, February 6, 1988, smack dab during the opening ceremonies of the Calgary Olympic games, my dearest parents named me, Justin (just so happened to be the most popular name of 1988, trust me, there were 4 in my graduating class of 68) Rex (after my grandfather, Rex Fuller Baker) and Baker, being my father's surname. Their intentions were never to call me Justin, or Rex, but rather JR. Unfortunately, the name never stuck for anyone more than my father, and his mother. Every now and again a cousin, or sometimes my mother calls me by J, or JR but not as it was supposed to be. I dreamed as a kid of having that be my name, I had friends that were JD's and CJ's and JJ's and I wanted to be an initial name. I decided in the 8th grade that I could not ever have that identity until I was on my own, and I would force myself to start introducing myself as what I wanted to be called, but my friends beat me to it. I did try though, looking through my old CD collections I realized that not only did I have an extreme fetish with making a new mix every day, I called them all by the same name. JR Tunes followed by a number. I was not sure what it would become, but one day, when I am rich and famous, I want my industry to be JR (fill in the blank)... But why is naming, and identity so important?

For me it came down to was I was not sure who I wanted to be, until I was assumed to be someone else. Ok, let me explain. I always went by Justin, up until my mission. I was given a new name then, Elder Baker. It was an honor, and a privilege to have that title. During my service I made a friend, and he found out my full birth name. I don't blame him for this, but he stripped me of my title. He started to call me Rex. He, not knowing that that bothered me, stopped for a while, and then it spilled out amongst all the others, and it was too late. They knew that it bothered me, and they also knew that I couldn't do anything about it. I was humiliated to a point, and then I stopped letting it bother me. With some council from a dear friend, and some insight into the word Rex, I realized that Rex in Latin means King. I can deal with people calling me a king. I somehow became roommates with most of these missionaries that assumed me the identity of Rex, and now, half of the campus that knows me, knows me by Rex, because I was introduced by someone else. But, I just couldn't have that... the people that I meet, the ones I want to become my true friends know me as Justin, because that is where I was most comfortable with my life. I introduce myself as Justin, and I have that identity. I want to be him, fun, exciting, musical, athletic, charming, witty, sarcastic, loving Justin. I don't want to be Rex anymore. I could live with JR. Perhaps that page has yet to be turned.

Next semester, nearly everyone who knows me as Rex will be gone... both those who introduce me as Rex, and those who assume me to be him. Perhaps I can change their thinking, and my identity can remain unscathed, but perhaps not. I guess the question comes down to myself. Can I, being myself, have the same identity, despite what I am called? Or will there always be a duality that exists? I guess only time will tell.